LIVING AS A CRIPPLED MAMA

Growing up, I had for main goals; I wanted to go to college-I graduated from Middle Tennessee State University with a Bachelor degree in Social Work in 1998; I wanted to get married-I married my best friend from college on November 7, 1998; I wanted to be a mother; Dalton was born on July 16th, 1999 and Bobbye Sue was born on September 5th, 2002; and I wanted to write.  I must says, I've been blessed beyond measures.  Many disabled people do not have the opportunities that I have had in life.
     Growing up, my parents made sure I had every thing I needed.  I knew I was disabled and that I always would be; but at the same time I thought when I grew up I'd be "normal".  I know that's a contradiction, but who can explain the mind of a child?  When it "hit" me; wow, life doesn't work that way it really affected me and my mind thought:  Who would I be when I go to college?  Would anybody ever love me?  Would I ever have kids of my own?   Could God use me?
      The answer was YES! I met my husband and we were friends for about a year before we became serious.  I think he had to come to terms with the fact that he wasn't going to marry and spend his life with a "normal" woman, plus one with a disability. (HAHA!)
     I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE being a mom.  Many people talk about how much their life change when the became a mother.  I truly believe a part a my life truly began when I became a mama.  My pregnancies were difficult, I went into labor at 26 weeks with Bobbye Sue and was in the hospital for almost 6 weeks before she was born. But it was so worth it!  They are both super kids and I'm enjoying the age they are now and who God is sculpting them  to be.  Dalton is starting to think about colleges and life beyond our family and Bobbye Sue is my social butterfly.  She loves to go to school and church and would be involved in something 24/7 if we let her.  But most of all, the love and want to serve the  Lord. What more could a Mama ask for???
     Because of my disability and the part of the brian that was affected (I was strangled by the umbilical cord when I was born), I suffer from depression and some other emotional issues.  This, in all honesty, is the hardest part of being disabled.  You can deal with and adapt to physical needs but the mental aspect of it is harder to deal