MEMORIES OF TWO LIVES CUT SHORT

His name was Tony Bay.  He went  to Alabama State University, where I was studding to get my master degree in Social Work.  He was studying to b a engineer and was in ROTC.    His roommate, Ryan Fogle , was a different story.
Ryan was a freshmen who wanted to study business.  His big sister, Caryn was one of my closet friend.  We went to church together.   
It all started at a weekend retreat.  Caryn was the organizer of the retreat and I was one of the group leader.  My co-leader was Will Angler.  I was excited.   I loved being able to share my faith and testimony with others.    Caryn put Ryan in our group.  I don't think he even wanted to be there, but I think he came out of duty to his sister.  
The retreat started out great.  All the leaders share their testimonies, there are small group discussion, games and great fellowship.  I was really impressed of how open Ryan was to share and how knowledgeable he was of the bible.  I must admit at the time, I was not in my bible as I am not should have been.  The church I attended did not put a great emphasis on it.  
The retreat was Friday through Sunday.  It was held in a high school gym.  While we did sleep there, there was a couple of hours on Saturday afternoon when we could go home, take a shower, grap a nap, ect.  
I had a prior commitment the kept me from going back to the retreat at the same time everyone else.  When I got there at ten o'clock that night, I was surprised that Ryan hadn't came back.  Caryn said all he had said to her was he wasn't coming back; with no explanation.
The rest of the weekend was great.  But come Monday, it was back to classes and work.  I had meant to call and check on the members of my group, but I had to work over time, two test to study for and a paper to write.  It's no excuse, I just didn't make time for it.he
The next weekend I went home for the weekend.  When I got back to campus, the was a buzz that a student had stabbed his roommate to death because he was transgender and  the roommate had walked on him and his partner.  He slayed him right there, with the partner watching.  
I didn't find out until later in the week that  Ryan was the one who had killed  his roommate.  When I heard, my heart sunk.  To this day,  I go over and over the retreat, thinking what happen?  Did I miss something?   If he would have came back from the break, could it had made a difference?  
  I tried to talk to Caryn, but her phone kept going to voice mail.  After a few weeks, her phone had been cut off.  The last I heard, she'd transferred to a small college in Texas.  I've tried to find her with no luck.
The funeral was private, but the school had a memorial service about three weeks after the funeral.  For some reason I felt obligated to go.  I sat in the back of the auditorium.  Tears flowed down my face as I listen to Ton's family and friends tell about his life and how he had planned on being an advocate for homosexual solders in the arm forces.  Tony and his partner had planed on getting married  after they graduated.
It's been twenty years since Ryan killed is Tony.  He was convicted of first degree murdered and is serving a life sentence at Alabama State Maximum Security Prison.  I pray him and Caryn and their family, just as I pray for for Tony's  family.  My prayer is that one day they will all find peace.

2016 in 16 Words

We knew it would be hard when granddaddy died, but my kids' strength shined through tears.

The Argument ~ A Work of Fiction

DAY 1 - THE APARTMENT

"I love it."  She said as she swirled around the living room; with its red shag carpet and dark paneling..  It had an alley kitchen painted puke green, a bedroom with paisley wall paper that was starting to peal  The dark pink bathroom was tiny; if you stood up to wipe, you were leaning into the deep, claw footed tub. But,hey, what can $500 a month get you?
"I don't know, Lezza. It's a lot of money."  I stared out the window.  

"$250 each."  She came up and hugged him from behind.  "You know you love it, Brady."

I turned around and pulled her closed to me.  "I do, mostly because you do.  I just don't like that it's so far out of town  when I work so much, especially at night."

"C'mon.  I'm not some wilted wallflower that needs to be protected."

"I know that. I'm actually more worried that if someone broke in, we'd have to pay their medical bills.'  I kissed her.  "You have a pretty quick draw with that little pink pistol of yours."

"You look so tired." she rubbed his cheek. "This would be a nice haven from working all those hours at those hospital."

"You sure you aren't going to miss Old Man Davis and Miss Viola's Saturday night rendezvous above us?" I asked, running my hand through her long, red hair."

"Uhm, no.  In fact, we can get even louder." She giggled.  

"I like the way you think, Mrs. Laven-Black." I kissed her again.

Someone behind us cleared their throat.  "Excuse me?"

Lezza moved out of my arms.  "We're sorry, Mrs. Lampton.  We'll take it."

"Great!" The grandma clapped her hands as if this was the best news she'd ever heard. "I've already done you background check, so all you've got to do is sign the paper, Give me the first and last month's rent and I'll give you the keys

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"You hungry?" Lezza asked as we got closer to home.

"Uhm, beer and pizza from Lugi's?  I don't think I want to  go in anywhere." I put my hand on her right knee, leaned back and closed my eyes.  

"You OK?"

"UHM.  I all of a sudden have a bad headache." I yawned and rubbed my eyes.  “It smelled liked new paint in there.”

“If they painted anything, they wasted their money.”  Lezza pulled into a parking place in front of Lugi’s.”  I’m sure the fact that you haven’t slept in almost 50 hours has nothing to do  with your headache.”

I glanced at my watch. It was 7:15.  “I know. I plan to be fed, showered and asleep  by 8.”

She giggled.  “You’re not gonna stay up and help me pack?”  

“Uh, no.  I can’t believe the first 3 days off I’ve had in months is going to be spent moving.” I groaned.  

“Just think of how nice it’is going to be living in a actual a house?  Hey, you know what the house needs”

“Oh God!” I propped my elbow against the window and rubbed my temple. “I swear if you say the B word I’m going to blow my brains out with that little pink gun of yours.”  

“Actually,  I was thinking about the D word.  What’s so bad about having a baby?”

I groaned. “I just don’t think it’s the right time to have a kid.”

She stared at me.  “So, if I told you I was two months pregnant, what would you say?

I glared at her.  “Are you?”

“No, but it’s good to know what you would think!”  She pulled out of  that parking lot.

“Where are you going, what about supper?”

“I’m not hungry!  I’m going home so you can take a shower and go to bed, which is all you seem to care about.”

“Lezza, you know that’s not true!”

“You could have fooled me!”

“Dammit, can we please not do this?  I can not handle your craziness tonight.  My head is about to split wide open and I’m exhausted.”

“When are you not?  This is your life, and I’m just here when it’s convenient for you.”

“That’s not fair!  You know I love you.”

“Yeah.” she pulled into the parking lot in front of their apartment.

“What the hell do you want, Lezza?  I’m doing the best I can!”

“So, I hear.” She got out of the car, slammed the door and went in the apartment.  

“Damn it to hell!” I yelled and leaned my  head against the headrest. My head felt like thousands of jack hammer were trying to destroy my brain.  I must have fell asleep.  When I woke up and finally stumbled into the apartment, it  was 9:15.  Lezza was watching TV.  “Hey, what’s up?

She glared at me  and went back to her show.

“Good God!” I groaned and went into the bedroom.  I started the shower and took 3 Excedrin PM.  The hot shower was great.  

“I’m going to bed.” I stood behind her and leaned down to kissed to Lezza. She moved her head away.

“Whatever!” I moaned and went to bed.  I tossed and turn for half an hour until exhaustion finally took over.  When I woke up, the alarm clock said it was 2:30 and Lezza hadn’t came to bed.  I found her in the living room floor, surrounded by boxes and watching  a Lifetime movie.

“What did you do, rob a liquor store?” I laid on the couch, covering up with the afghan Lezza’s grandma had crochet us for our wedding.

“Yes, plus I got pizza.  You hungry?”

“Not really. Am I still in the dog house?” I yawned.

“No.” she sat up on her knees and kissed me. “I’m so sorry,  I really acted ugly to you.”

I kissed her hand.  “I’m sorry too.  Honey, you know I want to have kids, and if you were pregnant I would be ecstatic.  I just don’t think it’s the right time.  We go days without seeing each other.  I’m always exhausted; sometimes all I can think about is the next time I can close my eyes, even if it’s only for ten minutes.  I want to be involved, but with two more years of residency I just don’t  see that happening.  I don’t want you to resent me because you feel  like a single mom.  You deserve the best of me.  Our kids, when we  choose to have them, deserve the best of me.  My work and my patients deserve the best of me. Half the time, I feel like I’m not doing anything right.”  My eyes were starting to water.”

“I’m sorry, Brady.” She wiped my tears away, even though there were tears flowing down her cheeks.  “I never meant to make you feel bad.”

“I know.  I just don’t want to disappoint you.” I entangled my fingers with hers.

“Never!” She kissed me.  “The first time I met you Mom, she told me that when you friends use to play cowboys and indians that you actually set up a MASH tent  in your backyard.”

“I couldn’t just watch them all bleed to death.” I laughed.

“And that’s why I love you so much.  You’re going to be as great of doctor and father as you are a husband.  I know you’re right; it’s not the right time`.  I know you ‘ exhausted and you’re working so  hard.  I want to make life easier, not more difficult for you.”

“And you do!”  I pulled her onto my lap.  “There’s not a day goes by that I’m not thankful for.  You take care of me and our life, so that I can do what I need to do to finish my degree.  If I didn’t have you, I don’t know what I’d do.”

She tossed her hair, is smelled like ginger.   “You’d be a  walking zombie.”

He yawned.   “If we get a dog, you can name it ‘baby’.”

She hit him in the stomach, but laughed.  “You’re a jerk.”

“A very tired jerk.  Will you please come lay down with me?”

~THE END~