I AM WONDERFULLY MADE

Growing with Cerebral Palsy, I didn't see my self as "special" or "wonderfully made".  No, in fact it was quite the opposite.  There was something wrong with me.  I wasn't like everyone else.  Not only did the word "special" hold a negative quality; there was NOTHING special about me.  I wasn't pretty, I walked like i was drunk, (I don't drink anymore, but when I did I walked fine), people made fun of me when I talked, and assumed that I wasn't smart.

The worst thing, though, was the STARES! (Looking back on it, I should have pretended I was famous and acted like a diva!).  People naturally look at someone who is different from them and I must admit, I do too.

Psalm 139: 13 says:

13 For you created my inmost being;

    you knit me together in my mother’s womb

My disability did not occur until after I was born; I was strangled by the umbilical cord.  Therefore, I know that I was created specifically in my mother's womb.  The Bible actually uses the word knit, which implies that God took His time and made me uniquely.  He created me to be loving and kind, to have a heart for people and compassion.  

Psalm 139:14 says;

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

    your works are wonderful,

    I know that full well.

While I don't think God caused me to be disabled, I do believe He allowed me to be disabled.  I praise Him for the Cerebral Palsy. (Not always, but I working on it.)    I believe that God allowed me to be disabled as part of my ministry.  I don't always understand why, but every now and then He gives me a glimpse of what my ministry is and it's beautiful!